My Birthday!!

 March 16 1968. That’s the day I was born…..FIFTY EIGHT years ago. Lord help me! On the 20th it’s a boys 60th birthday. 

How is that possible? Seriously. That’s nuts! I feel like I’m in my 20’s but much wiser! I didn’t realize that our brain feels so much younger then we are. 

Anyway! Do you know what that means? It means that it’s been almost, within a few weeks, 40 years since I heard a boy’s voice being proud of his new bomber jacket. It made my heart melt and I’d never even seen him. Just a voice that sounded like a little boy who was proud of his new Easter Clothes. Then I met him at the cash register where my mom told him that his mom had just hired me. He told me to come in the following Saturday so he could show me the ropes. I walked out of there and told my mother that I was gonna get him. I went that Saturday. The alarm must not have gone off because he didn’t come out of the kitchen. I could hear him with his girlfriend so I sat down and waited for her little car to leave. Then I went in. He was so cute and funny and I just felt immediately connected. Maybe we do have past lives…. Souls strung together by the invisible red string… I followed him like a puppy. When it was time for me to leave his mother pulled me aside and told me that she wasn’t going to pay me for the day because I just followed him. That was shitty and I didn’t give a fuck. I probably would have showed up every day for free to watch him play pool, if I’m honest. Pretty soon the girlfriend stopped coming to the restaurant. 

We’d leave at the same time, we also went home the exact same way…and for a couple of weeks one of us would follow the other, I would turn off at my turn and he’d keep going until one night he was ahead of me and he turned at my turn, he turned his car around and I stopped. We talked to each other from our cars until he asked if I wanted to go for a drive. I definitely wanted to go for a dive, the red Camaro…. The butterflies, the way I was super proud of myself for chasing him until he caught me. He took me to the restaurant his girlfriend’s parents owned, told me to scooch down in the seat so I wasn’t seen, we never went back there again. Many many drives were had. I wish I had asked him what made him decide to stop that night. Had he planned it? Was it a little voice in his head? Was there an angel on one shoulder and that beautiful devil on the other? I had never before or after felt that instant connection. I just knew him. I knew how he’d feel, how he’d smell, how he’d taste. I was exactly right. We just fit.

Boy, the roller coaster, the ups and downs. Low lows, high highs. Best and hardest ride of my life. Wouldn’t have missed it. THE DANCE. It’s been 16 years since we caught back up. Time flies doesn’t it? 

Song…. More than a feeling by BOSTON

Luv, me, still me just wiser.