Might be going back…

 To the hospital and I’m less than thrilled but while I’m talking about it I want to give some little known hospital tricks…

1) If you’re going to the ER have a bag packed. I put an outfit to leave in, sports bras( come on now, you want your breasts to be where god put them) chargers, your own blanket…

2) Take a shower and DO YOUR MAKEUP if you think it’s possible that you’ll be admitted. Now, if you’re using a good primer and setting spray you can get a couple of solid days out of your makeup. Hit the eyes with liner and mascara HARD.

3) I got my nails done, come on now! Look at some of the patients these people have to look at. Do better.

4) if you end up being admitted with no prior notice, well I’m Here for you, baby.

a) you take a shower in the hospital and you have no product for your hair…. Yes you do. You take a little of that lotion they’ve given you and rub some on your hands, you have short hair, give yourself some volume, long hair keep those fly aways in control, curly hair, here’s your product, just scrunch a little. 

B) you don’t have deodorant? Yes you do. You take that mouthwash they give you and alcohol kills bacteria. Bacteria causes B.O. even better… use their hand sanitizer! 

C) things are going off the rails and your hair is getting greasier by the second…. Baby powder, you’re in a hospital, they have some. You think that someone invented dry shampoo? No. We used it in the 80’s! The first day of washing your hair does not give you that voluminous hair you were looking for. Sprinkle a bit in, give it a good rub with your fingers. Your hair is clean! 


Went to a craft fair here on Saturday. In a wheel chair. FRUSTRATING! Accidentally bought myself three Christmas gifts. Gave them to my husband and told him to put them away because if you know me, you know I’m not even going to remember if I got them or what they looked like. Seriously, it’s amazing. 

I’ve started to leave the water/tea/honey/lemon out of the hot toddy and went straight for Fireball. That shit helps your cough so you can at least get a couple of hours of sleep. Forget about becoming an alcoholic, we’ll deal with that when our lungs work. 


Nice talk.

Song?

No real reason… I just like it, maybe , just maybe I’ve been that girl…


Tough Girl by Tyler Hammond

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hey.

 So, hopefully most of  everyone got my email. If not, I’m starting from scratch. Hi. It’s been a minute! Like, I’m a year older. There’s so much to catch up on that I don’t know where to start….  Let’s get this out of the way. No, I have not spoken with my children. OM got divorced. Instead of going back to her maiden name she made up a last name based on a…. Wait for it…. Disney move. Went to court and now that’s her last name. So, that was a little jarring. I got that news from Joshua while I was getting my nails done. Fun! I actually did speak to ym for a hot minute last month. My car was totaled by a hail storm. We still had it at her house in a different city so we did have to have contact. That went fine but no movement forward. So, ya. That’s that. Let’s see….. last year I was diagnosed with PMR polymyalgia rheumatica. It’s an autoimmune thing that basically paralyzes you. I had to wait … EIGHT months to see a specialist who wanted to put me on steroids for the re...
Read more

Here’s me

 On Monday my son and I got an uber, I think I mentioned that my car was totaled by hail…. Anyway, I splurged and got a really nice one, like hello, I’m a kardashian…. And I took him to the spa. He did not want to go. He had it in his head that it was going to be like People Soup…. But he LOVED it! We loved it! Had the best time. He’s good. My husband picked us up but, ugh, we did not want too. We have our favorite pools and he liked them best too. They play jazz music and you can just hear all the water falls. The funny thing is that I can see Plano out from my balcony, this is on the opposite side of what we can see, so, very close to home but also 30 minutes away because their is no straight connection. Both my husband and Josh like the pool where you can see the view of the city and at night, it’s stunning. Also helped my wrist! For the time we where there… My wrist is not good. I can’t hold a cup of coffee, I can’t type, I can’t paint. Argh!  Went swimming in Tuesday and ...
Read more

Deader than a Door Nail

 Ok, I have so many like really deep conversations that I’m just gonna get out of my system with you all. You good with that? Cool… I’m 57 years old and I realize that it’s way too late to be going through a midlife crisis but I am! I’m like,” I hope they come out with that third season pretty soon do I can see it before I die” I’ve decided that I probably have 10 good years left. TEN YEARS. It keeps me up at night! Yes it’s odd. I know this.  I go through this list of things I want to do and places I want to go and will I know my grandkids and WHERE THE FUCK did the time go? If I could go back to…. I don’t know, let’s say 1982 I’d fucking go! Then I think well, I for sure skip getting pregnant. I know exactly when it happened but if I did that then the things that followed wouldn’t have happened and I LOVE that I wasn’t a goody two shoes. Love that I took risks and did some crazy shit and lived abs guess what? I’ve never been afraid to tell my family about that stuff. Do I ha...
Read more